SADLY

I wish one day I could love someone that would love me back
Or someone would love me that I actually might love back
Guess we're living in a world somethings are not meant to be
It is true, sadly...

JADED

I've run out of the energy
The strength of moving on
I was a lot more optimistic than this
But now that old me is gone

With the sunrise everything cleared
Lifes true colors suddenly appeared
At that moment, when the most I needed it
Noone was there, so I became jaded

At that moment, I stopped caring
Ignored the fire that was flaring
But life already took a lot from me
Yeah, I guess it's too late for me...

Oh well...

BECAUSE I KNOW

A new chapter in my life is beginning
I'm not afraid though it's terrifying
Because I know if I don't let go
Things will turn out the way I want 'em to so

I'm in a new place that I don't know of
But I'm trying not to keep my expectations low
Because I know if I try to do my best
I'll eventually manage to fit in with the rest
__________________________________
I've transferred to another school this year and I don't know anyone around me. Guess I wanted to comfort myself a bit when I wrote it.

FIT IN

I got the news off guard today
The smile on my face was washed away
But I thought, I'm a human-being
There is no situation we can't fit in
_____________________________
I wrote this one today, when I found out that my school's opening this week instead of the next. Damn it!

THINGS'LL BE JUST FINE

Woke up with a collapse this morning
And not familiar with the path I'm following
But at night I see the stars are glowing
That's how I know things'll be just fine

Don't know of the language I'm speaking
Don't understand the voices I'm hearing
But I see the sun is brightly shining
That's how I know thing'll be just fine

Don't recognise the faces I'm seeing
Don't know of the point that I'm standing
But I see the picture that you're smiling
That's how I know things'll be just fine

As long as you are here and mine
Things'll be just fine...

SAVE ME

In this dark corner I seek
Someone to lead
Me out of this place
Into somewhere full of mercy and grace

I've run out on a limb
In this world named thing
I've only got one hope now
For someone to save me somehow

We'll see
If someone will save me...

ALONE IN TIME

Every 24 hours of my life
Just slip away out of my hands
Invisible to see as it passes by
Impossible to stop it from passing so fast

In the depths of the endless darkness
Distant voices and mindless violence
I feel more and more alone
With the unbreakable silence

MY PAIN

The fickle air conditions are here
The darkening rains are near
Though I may seem happy
I'm sad, don't be surprised with me

The rains were here throughout the day
Don't expect the rainbow to show at bay
Because the sun is crying with the rain
It may not appear because of the pain

If the sun is me and rain my tears
Rainbow my joy, along with my fears
It seems like a possibility so far
But maybe you'll understand who you are...?

IF I WASN'T

I think of all the painful ends I've planned for you
I want to choke you
Seeing from your eyes that you're wasting away
Your silent struggling will satisfy me
And then you'll be gone
I won't do that
But I would if I wasn't still in love with you

I think of all the painful ends I've planned for you
I want to push you in front of a car
Seeing from your eyes that you are afraid
Your fear will satisfy me
And then, crash!
I won't do that
But I would if I wasn't still in love with you

I think of all the painful ends I've planned for you
I want to slice you
Seeing from your eyes that you are suffering
Your pain will satisfy me
And then blood everywhere
I won't do that
But I would if I wasn't still in love with you

I think of all the painful ends I've planned for you
I want to push you off a cliff
Seeing from your eyes that you know the end is near
Your screams will satisfy me
And then, splat!
I won't do that
But I would if I wasn't still in love with you

Yeah, you see,
That's what you did to me
And you still don't care!
I'd get back at you
Only if I wasn't still in love with you!

But that day will come...

PLEASE...

Please...
If it's cloudly, don't push it
It might rain
And when it does rain
Please...
Let the sun shine
It's mandatory for the rainbow to appear again
If it's windy
Please...
Walk in that direction
If it's draught
Just a bit of affection
And it will be all bright and still again

IT WAS NEVER THERE

I've been wandering in the house for hours
Building up the courage to call it home
But I can't, it was never there
Guess it was home sweet hell all along

I've been thinking about the jolly times we once had
To feel that good old happiness again
Now I see that it was all fake
Thinking we were happy once was a mistake

THE BLACK EMPTINESS

The black emptiness that I am in
By days passing, grows more and more
Every single time that I walk in
It gets even harder to find the door

At night the moon, at day the sun shines
It's never really dark in our lives
But no matter how bright the light is
It's never enough to dominate my darkness

The voices that I hear in my head
Remind me of what I've once had
I don't listen despite them being kind
Because I have already lost my mind

The shadow that follows you
Is only as big as you
But my shadow is a lot bigger than me
Maybe this originates from the darkness in me...?

WASTE

Millions of things I wanna do
But can't because I don't have the chance
Lots of places I wanna go
But can't because I don't have the time
A shame really...
What a waste of life...

THANK YOU

Think of a cloudy day
It's all dark even in noon
The weather that makes you sad
When I feel like that inside
You are the shining sun showing itself beyond the clouds
You are the one that makes me feel good again
So,
Thank you

Think of a rainy day
The weather that blackens you inside
The weather of dark thoughts
When I feel that way inside
You are the rainbow glowing after the rain
You are the one that makes me feel colorful again
So,
Thank you

For giving me a reason to live
Thank you

WHAT'S THE POINT?

What's the point of dreaming?
It'll be gone when I wake up
What's the point of wishing?
It's never gonna come true
What's the point of living?
I'm never gonna have you

MY LOVE

I'd give it all for you
But considering I have nothing
You're stuck with my love
Sorry...

NO REGRET

If I feel an emptiness inside of me
It's because of your absence
If I feel pain inside of me
It's because of your sadness
And if I feel no regret in me
It's because I love you...

LOST

In a dark alley I walk straight ahead
For my dream to come true
And worst nightmare to end
And it all blurs again
As I start to understand

I LOVE YOU

I've been wanting to tell you this for so long
But I've lost my last chance to tell you
Though I know that now, you are gone
I still have the hope that I'll see you

YOU & ME

The autumn winds start to blow again
Oh, how nice it is to see it rain
You are those winds that cause my pain
And I'm the rain, calling out your name

The sun shines more brightly than normal today
Until the dark clouds cause it to fade away
You are the clouds that suffocate me
And I'm the sun, still loving you carelessly

The rain stops, here's the rainbow
The clouds are gone, sun is bright as snow
In the end we realize it together
It'll be just you and me, forever and ever...

WITHOUT YOU

Everyday starts and ends alone
Without this dream of mine coming true
You saying that it's alright, you're here with me
And one day it will end with me, but
Without you

Every minute is an eternity
Every word is your name
Every breath is your voice
And every tear is me
Without you

Everyday millions of ideas come and go
Billions of people go here to there
Anonymous and with no faces
I am one of them as long as I am
Without you

And someday if I waste away
I'll know that you won't know
And if my love kills me one day
I will go slowly and unhappy
Without you

I WAIT FOR YOU

I'm having one of those days again
I feel the need of getting away
But I don't want to leave without you
So I just sit tight and wait for you

I'm having one of those days again
I want to run around in the rain
But I don't want to do it without you
So you can join me, I wait for you

I'm having one of those days again
All depressed and feel like crying
But I don't want to feel like that without you
For you to comfort me, I wait for you

I'm having one of those days again
Desperately dreaming of you
But I still know I'm without you
Despite of it, I'll never give up
And forever wait for you

I'M SORRY

I'm so sorry
It was a weak moment for me
When I found out you weren't coming
I just fell apart and lost myself
And the knife was just by myside
I'm sorry
Good thing is, I'm not in any pain
My need for you hurts more
So I don't feel it

But I feel so empty inside
Not because I'm bleeding
It's because you're not here with me
And you'll never be

I'm so sorry
It was a weak moment for me
When I finally faced the truth
I couldn't think of anything
I just wanted to hurt myself
The pain could have hid your absence
I'm sorry
It didn't, if I wasn't the one who caused it
I never would have noticed it

I die slowly as I lay on the floor
Not because I'm mortally wounded
It's because you're not here with me
And you'll never be

I'm sorry...